New Plans for a New Year

I hope you all had a happy and safe new year! Thank you very much to my Aunt Ann and her son Randy for making the drive from Cadillac to visit my dad on New Year's Eve. I wish I could have been there, but I know it meant a lot to my dad. You have been such longtime family friends and supporters!

On New Year's Eve, Chad and I stopped by with a bottle of champagne to celebrate with my dad at around 8:30 or 9pm, but my dad had just finished a bath and was put into bed when we arrived. He fell asleep within minutes of getting into bed so we didn't get to crack open the champagne, but it felt good to be together on New Year's Eve, anyway. On New Year's Day, my Aunt Oi and Uncle Liem came by my house and showed me how to make a delicious Vietnamese dish called "bahn cuon." My mom brought some to my dad for dinner, and he ate it all. Yippee!

In this new year, my family is faced with a couple of decisions. The Medicare coverage of my dad's stay at Birchwood will end on January 19, so we have to decide what to do after that. Hospice is covered under my dad's insurance, so I my dad and I met with an admissions coordinator from Hospice on Friday. For me there has always been such a stigma around Hospice, and I'm worried my dad will also "give up" if he knows Hospice is working with him. He fell asleep during the meeting, almost as soon as the woman from admissions introduced herself. I was wondering if that's the only way my dad can cope with this idea. I don't know. I know that when my grandmother and my great aunt moved to Muskegon to be closer to our family so my dad could help them, they were not at all themselves in an unfamiliar town surrounded by unfamiliar neighbors and no friends. I've often thought about that, and now that experience seems especially poignant. I do know that I can offer more help to my father here, and I know he has so many good friends who are willing to travel to see him, but I'm definitely concerned about taking him away from his environment and his friends. Hospice could come to visit him at a nursing facility or at my home (or his home, if we chose that), but the most important thing to me is that my dad is where he wants to be. I've tried asking him on a couple of occasions, but even if he has been answering my previous questions with a nod or shake of the the head, he doesn't respond when I ask, "Would you like to stay in Traverse City or would you like to return to Muskegon?" I'll try asking again, but if any of you have experiences that you'd like to share or any direction or advice, I'd gladly listen.

With this January will also come my dad's 67th birthday. His joke is that his "birthdate is a poker straight," which means his birthday is exactly 3 weeks from today, on the 23rd. I was thinking it might be nice to have a birthday party, and I would be willing to drive him to Muskegon or Grand Haven for a Saturday or Sunday. I have two questions, then: (1) Is there interest for this? and (2) If so, would anyone like to help me plan/coordinate something?

 All righty, that's all for now. Talk to you soon!